This happened one day…
G1: Mum, can you sit here and watch me write?
What? Are you kidding me? I spent the entire morning with you and now I want you to entertain yourself for a bit while I get some household chores done and you want me to twiddle my thumbs while you busy yourself with an activity that doesn’t require my full attention?
At the time, I didn’t understand. But now, I think I get it. Even though I am a constant presence in their lives and I spend a lot of time with them, I am not always “present”. The FISH! Philosophy explains it better…
Be There: When people need you, they need all of you. Setting aside distractions and judgments to be fully present is a sign of respect. It improves communication and strengthens relationships.
With our fast-paced, hectic lifestyles, there is rarely enough time in a day to do all the things we want to do. I have noticed that even when I am physically present, I am often emotionally absent because I’m thinking about other things (most probably because I’m attempting to multitask – which we know doesn’t work) and my boys feel it.
It did not occur to me until I bumped into an acquaintance in an elevator. She asked me about my Chinese New Year and it must have been half a minute before I realised she had asked me a question.
So now I’m making it a point to spend a little time each day with each of my boys where I am “all there”.
One-to-One Time with G2 in the morning before school…
Nurture for the Future 